A local boy is venting his frustration over the new iBook, saying he's not tempted to lick it as much as the old design.
"Tangerine
and blueberry. That's delicious," the local boy said. "Who wants
to lick something that's silvery white? Not me."
He's not alone. In a recent MacComedy poll, 64% of those surveyed said they wouldn't lick something that was silvery white, 29% said they would, and 7% said "Why are you squeezing my arm?"
Lately, Apple has seemed to favor a sleeker, more polished look, as opposed to the fruity flavors made popular with the five revision B iMacs. Many believe a new iMac design is imminent next month at MacWorld and insiders say it won't be fruity.
Some believe the turning away from lickable computers may be due to safety concerns. "Apple has to be careful not to encourage people to lick their computers," said Goldman Sachs analyst Rick Sherlund. "Someone sticks their tongue in a Firewire port and you have big problems."
Aqua, the interface to Apple's new operating system Mac OS X, may cause more computer licking. Retail stores which have Macs running OS X are reporting that they have to clean tongue marks off the monitors several times a day.
"We're
using up a lot more Windex than we used to," said Marc Rossin, CompUSA
salesperson. "I've never seen someone lick a PC before. Never."
Microsoft chairman Bill Gates, smoking his ever present crack pipe, warned that this is just another problem with Mac OS X. "Do you really want your employees licking their computer screens?" asked Gates. "Microsoft does not think the future lies in lickable computer interfaces."
Meanwhile, insiders at Microsoft say the company is currently working on a more lickable interface to Windows.
But perhaps Apple's migration away from fruity Macs to sleeker designs could bring on a new breed of difficulties.
"Apple may be heading towards something even more dangerous than licking computers," said Sherlund. "When Steve Jobs introduced the Titanium Powerbook G4, he referred to it not as lickable, but sexy. That could bring on a whole new world of problems. And injuries."
But the local boy is still upset with his new iBook.
"I don't want to lick it, I don't want to have sex with it, I just want to use it as the center of my digital world. What fun is that?"
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