OS X was "just a big joke"

Apple's "real" next generation operating system due in October

Apple Computer announced today that its OS X operating system was "just a big joke".

"We thought it would be funny to release a fake operating system at first and then surprise people later in the year," said Phil Schiller, Apple's vice president of worldwide marketing. "It shows that Apple has a sense of humor, just like the average computer user."

"I never thought we'd be able to pull it off," said Apple CEO Steve Jobs. "Especially when (Apple's senior vice president of software engineering) Avie (Tevanian) said 'Hey, let's make the first version not able to burn CDs or play DVDs!' I almost pissed my pants! I can't believe I went along with it."

Apple says that the "real" version has been completed since January. "We spent an extra two months just making the gag version," said Tevanian.

The new OS will look practically identical to OS 9.x, but still have all the powerful features Apple has been talking about, such as protected memory and preemptive multitasking. The "Aqua" interface was "all part of the gag".

"Most of the credit should go to Schiller," said Tevanian. "He's the one that said 'Hey, let's make the buttons look like pieces of candy!' And Steve goes, 'Yeah, I'll say you'll just want to lick the screen!' People at Microsoft never have this much fun."

The real operating system upgrade, called Mac OS XPD, should hit shelves mid-October. Why the delay if it's already complete?

"We're just working on the box. That boring "X" logo was obviously a joke, too," said Schiller. "We're looking to make the box a little more exciting. 'XPD' will be in sparkly letters or possibly a hologram. A girl in a bikini will be holding up a sign that says "Mac", and another will be holding a sign that says "OS". We may have a third girl just lying across the bottom. We're still testing the idea."

When asked if things such as the genie effect and bouncing icons in the dock will be part of Mac OS XPD, Schiller laughs.

"You just don't get it, do you?"

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